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3 DAYS UNTIL IDOL DEBUT...!!!
Lord I don't feel ready. During the last practice we had I totally had a breakdown because I'd convinced myself, in a hormone driven state, that I didn't have what it took to stand on stage alongside everyone else. I really regret not downing a few more painkillers, I wish I could've gotten some final critics in, but it is what it is, ykno? C'est la vie.
Beyond idoling I've also been completely SLAMMED by my classes this semester. Doubling my course load this semester may not have been the smartest decision on my part, but really what can you do? I'm here now so I just have to make the most of it. I'm currently writing from my Intro to The Arts class and I think this is the only class I have a poor grade in. Not due to me failing at the arts, but due to me missing a class day. I just spoke with the teacher about it though and she told me not to worry. She even said she could tell I was a "very artistic person" and that I'd "do great in this class". Way to boost my ego Prof.
What else can I talk about... Valentine's day is coming up! Me and my partner plan to spend the day (after my debut) running around the Artist Alley and Dealer's Den getting things for each other, so that should be fun. I'm honestly a bit nervous, but the more I think about it the more anxious I get. I just hope I don't disappoint I guess. Holidays are scary for me no matter what, especially gift giving ones. I always worry about getting the right thing and spending the right amount and not doing TOO MUCH but not doing too little either. It's paradoxical in a way that makes me anxious to no end.
Honestly, despite having had such a busy few weeks, I have so little to talk about. So I guess that's all for now!